MajorPayne
08-01-2005, 07:22 PM
As some of you may or may not know, a handheld device was released in 2003 by a company called Tapwave, the company was headed by a man named Bryon Connelle, and the device was called the zodiac. It was a PDA/game device, that could play mp3's, movies, and some 3D games. However the thing never caught on, and the company recently whent out of business. I decided to write a series of fictional news stories covering the future of the device....
Tapwave developes laser
Monday August 15.
In a surprise development, Tapwave announced today that all profit of the zodiac handheld, were used to develop a secret high powered laser to destroy sony's PSP development factories. The tapwave team had this to say "It became increasingly clear that we could not compete in a market dominated by big name companies such as Sony and Nintendo, so about 6 months after launch of the zodiac handheld, we began dumping all profit of the zodiac handheld into a secret laser cabable of destroying the PSP manufacturing plants". This comes as a shock to the gaming community, one gamer had this to say "H0ly Sh17 s0|\|!" .
These events have sparked up question on the legality of the issue, however in a surprise move, Hilary clinton has shown overwhelming support for Tapwave's recent actions, she apparently had this to say "Tapwave has shown in the past, and continues to show now, that they hate good, original, and fun games as much as I do". In a recent interview with Bryon connelle, we asked whether or not this means that zodiac support will resume once the competition is destroyed, Bryon responded "F**k no! We just want to blow the Sh!t out of those mother Fackin B!tches" . The laser codenamed the zapwave, will be completed sometime around christmas, surprisingly Bryan showed no interest in destroying nintendo, he was quoted in saying "Sh!T then we might get sued fool!".
This is no doubt and interesting development, and we plan to keep you informed on all further developments
Tapwave launches the Zapwave
January 1 2006
The gaming industry is in shock, after Tapwave whent through with it's plans to destroy the Sony's manufacturing plants. The High powered laser, was launched into orbit on october 8th, and was fired on December 7th. Tapwave celebrated the event by giving everybody who bought a zodiac 1 penny, that makes exactly 100 pennys.
However, while tapwave celebrated, Sony launched it's plan to stop tapwave from ever launching the laser. In order to do this, they struck a deal with Arnold Swarzenegger, to travel back in time and stop tapwave before it was ever formed. The Project is expected to go into action sometime next month. Tapwave has countered sony's proposal by hiring the talented Michael Jay Fox, to travel back in time and keep the governator from bringing down Tapwave. Bryon connelle seemed confident in a recent interview stating "Our recent aquisition of Michael Jay Fox, and his indepth knowledge of time travel, will ensure our companies survival".
This is turning out to be an interesting fight none the less, and you can bet we will keep you informed of any further, or past events.
Sony's time control experiment fails
February 18, 2006
Today Sony announced that in it's recent time control experiment, the governer of california, Arnold Swarzenegger has died. Sony's lead scientist on the matter, the Wu Tang twins had this to say "We shoulda known somethin be wrong when all the test monkays dieded". This came as great news to Tapwave, who were worried that Sony could travel back in time and cripple the small company before it was ever created.
Tapwave also announced today, that it would not be going through with it's own time control project, because it couldn't gather the funds to buy a 1982 delorean.
Tapwave signs deal with Satan, Jesus dissaproves
March 25,2006
During a recent press confrence, Tapwave and Satan revealed that they were in the transition of making a deal to resurrect the dead company. Bryon connelle had this to say "I am very pleased with Satan's cooperation with us on making this deal a reality, we closed negotiation yesterday, and we hope to continue business with satan in the future". However the deal is striking up controversy on whether or not it is legal, as the final draft would give satan the souls of all zodiac owners.
The republican party has assembled a legal team to battle the deal, the team which is headed by Jesus is expected to seek help from the supreme court tomorrow.
We will certainly keep you updated with where this story goes.
Tapwave developes laser
Monday August 15.
In a surprise development, Tapwave announced today that all profit of the zodiac handheld, were used to develop a secret high powered laser to destroy sony's PSP development factories. The tapwave team had this to say "It became increasingly clear that we could not compete in a market dominated by big name companies such as Sony and Nintendo, so about 6 months after launch of the zodiac handheld, we began dumping all profit of the zodiac handheld into a secret laser cabable of destroying the PSP manufacturing plants". This comes as a shock to the gaming community, one gamer had this to say "H0ly Sh17 s0|\|!" .
These events have sparked up question on the legality of the issue, however in a surprise move, Hilary clinton has shown overwhelming support for Tapwave's recent actions, she apparently had this to say "Tapwave has shown in the past, and continues to show now, that they hate good, original, and fun games as much as I do". In a recent interview with Bryon connelle, we asked whether or not this means that zodiac support will resume once the competition is destroyed, Bryon responded "F**k no! We just want to blow the Sh!t out of those mother Fackin B!tches" . The laser codenamed the zapwave, will be completed sometime around christmas, surprisingly Bryan showed no interest in destroying nintendo, he was quoted in saying "Sh!T then we might get sued fool!".
This is no doubt and interesting development, and we plan to keep you informed on all further developments
Tapwave launches the Zapwave
January 1 2006
The gaming industry is in shock, after Tapwave whent through with it's plans to destroy the Sony's manufacturing plants. The High powered laser, was launched into orbit on october 8th, and was fired on December 7th. Tapwave celebrated the event by giving everybody who bought a zodiac 1 penny, that makes exactly 100 pennys.
However, while tapwave celebrated, Sony launched it's plan to stop tapwave from ever launching the laser. In order to do this, they struck a deal with Arnold Swarzenegger, to travel back in time and stop tapwave before it was ever formed. The Project is expected to go into action sometime next month. Tapwave has countered sony's proposal by hiring the talented Michael Jay Fox, to travel back in time and keep the governator from bringing down Tapwave. Bryon connelle seemed confident in a recent interview stating "Our recent aquisition of Michael Jay Fox, and his indepth knowledge of time travel, will ensure our companies survival".
This is turning out to be an interesting fight none the less, and you can bet we will keep you informed of any further, or past events.
Sony's time control experiment fails
February 18, 2006
Today Sony announced that in it's recent time control experiment, the governer of california, Arnold Swarzenegger has died. Sony's lead scientist on the matter, the Wu Tang twins had this to say "We shoulda known somethin be wrong when all the test monkays dieded". This came as great news to Tapwave, who were worried that Sony could travel back in time and cripple the small company before it was ever created.
Tapwave also announced today, that it would not be going through with it's own time control project, because it couldn't gather the funds to buy a 1982 delorean.
Tapwave signs deal with Satan, Jesus dissaproves
March 25,2006
During a recent press confrence, Tapwave and Satan revealed that they were in the transition of making a deal to resurrect the dead company. Bryon connelle had this to say "I am very pleased with Satan's cooperation with us on making this deal a reality, we closed negotiation yesterday, and we hope to continue business with satan in the future". However the deal is striking up controversy on whether or not it is legal, as the final draft would give satan the souls of all zodiac owners.
The republican party has assembled a legal team to battle the deal, the team which is headed by Jesus is expected to seek help from the supreme court tomorrow.
We will certainly keep you updated with where this story goes.